Crowds

Bizarrely enough, I've actually missed the crowds. The hustle and bustle, the anger of other shoppers, losing friends in the flow of the crowd, the art of weaving in and out people and wondering if the woman in front can possibly walk any slower. A new one, which happened today, was when a kid decided to sit on my friends feet as we were struggling to get into a shop...haha. The weird thing is that there can be so many people and you could be shopping for hours and not bump into anyone you know or you'll bump into someone you haven't seen in years...the magic of shopping. Especially christmas shopping, nothing like stressful shoppers getting those last little stocking fillers.

...ok, then there was this Alvin the Chipmunks promotion thing going on where there was a stage and random people dancing on it...what was the point?? If anything it put me off actually seeing the film, just reassured my first opinion about how pathetic it is remaking something I grew up as a child with...a classic. Ye, I had the chipmunks single that they released...love shack? Yeh, high pitch voices, your point?

Ramblings...

Home for Christmas

My first semester at uni is over. 12 weeks of meeting new people, experiencing lectures and assignments, going on a school placement and having a hire car, waking up at 5:30 in the morning for placement and generally having a good time.

It all feels quite surreal to be home, but i can't work out if being at home is the surreal part or the fact that I've been at uni. Last night I had presentation evening at my old school, it was really strange looking at everyone, it felt like a completely different world. It hasn't been that long but it's amazing how much people change. To be fair, I think I was noticed as changing the most by the change in my accent. Which on my half was a concious thing I've wanted to do for a while. Why? Well frankly because the accent I'm surrounded by at home isn't the best sounding and because I needed to improve it for professional reasons. If I'm meant to be teaching children, they need to be able to understand me lol.

Either way, I'm now 19 (yes it was my birthday the other week) and I'm home for the rest of 2007. It makes me realise that Uni is going to go by so quickly...am I preparing myself for the life beyond it?

The Wife of Noble Character

Proverbs 31:10-31

While waiting for my washing to be done I randomly opened up my Bible and came across this verse,

"A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life."

All the days of her life...this stood out to me. This means before she even meets him, before they know the existence of each other. These 6 words are full of hope, hope that there is someone out there, hope that brings some more meaning to our lives. However, this is quite scary, it means that we should be living our lives for something more...not to fall in to the trap of meaningless romances. That one day we will be accountable to this person who we should be waiting for and then watch their reaction as we tell them of our short comings. Just the thought of that hurts me. I feel I need to be honourable to this man even now, to wait faithfully with my whole heart until he enters my life. Do I want to offer this man a broken and torn heart?

If I'm thinking this for my future husband, then imagine the pain God will have when I meet him face to face! When we look through the book of my life! Just like I need to be faithful and loving to my future husband, I also should be (obviously) to God. I'm even more thankful for the cross...that blood was poured for my sins. That I can be continually forgiven, but just like you wouldn't want to hurt the love of your life with your mistakes, we shouldn't want to continuously do wrong to God.

I have so much to learn...God shape me!

She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

Getting stuck in...

...at last!
I've finally reached the stage of getting stuck into my Uni work, this is likely to be due to a sudden strike of fear. Today we had a lecture about our School Placements that we will be starting in 2 weeks and I realised how much I've got to do and it kind of linked everything together that they had been teaching us.

I've also had quite a good day today, did my first assignment in RE which was like 40% of the module this year and without the proper marks our tutor said we had all passed which is so good. We had to do presentations in groups of four and we were given a topic heading and we had to aim it at a primary age group...our group chose, "What is God like and how does believing in God influence peoples lives?". We decided to look at the Hindu and Christian God and we did a kinda comparison between the two but it was a bit hard to explain to the difference between Henotheism and Monotheism to 11year olds...so the comparison was quite subtle. Either way, it went quite well and I've learnt not to be over prepared for these things because I end up being too dependent on the actual words I've wrote rather than just knowing the content. I suppose if I spoke about a religion I was unsure of then I would be a it more nervous, but speaking in front of peers isn't really scary...you can't be afraid if you decide to be speaking in front of people for a career hehe.

Too much blabbing...

Another reason why I'm happy today...found out school placements...I got the Hire Car!!! Woo!!! But it all comes at a price, I only have the hire car because they situated me in a village school an hour away! Lol. 6am starts every morning for 3weeks! It even goes over my birthday!! Can't complain, I'm a young professional as my Mother keeps telling me, not an actually student but a young professional. Sounds scary really. The school is a Church of England school which is pretty cool actually, would like to see what they are like. I'm really quite excited about starting all this work, there is a lot of work to do but I'm enjoying it which I think it kind of important being that I've decided to have this career for life....well you never know God may intervene at any second. Cool with me though :)

Title-less

I find myself coming to write something with nothing in my head to write. Well to begin with I've got a bit of a cough, she says while having a coughing fit. I think it's got to a point where everyone at Uni is experiencing the tiredness issue...yep, all the lack of sleep begins to catch up on you. This is where you learn that students nap...you regress back to stages that you were at as children....napping! You wake up, go to lecture, eat, nap, tidy, nap, eat, nap, socialise and sleep. Before uni I couldn't get round the idea that my friends napped when coming back from school, seemed too bizarre of a concept to grasp, however, now I understand. I more than understand it though, I actually do it.

So I've had a little doze today, I actually need to do some washing and buy some food before going to choir tonight, but the idea of walking tescos seems like effort.

Ooo to update you on current events, I'm actually singing in Gloucester Cathedral tomorrow with the University choir for some uni ceremonies. I hope I don't cough throughout, wow that could annoy people....ooo that's why it's important to go shopping now, need food to take with me tomorrow...ah!

Either way, I'm feeling Christmas beginning to approach...need to start thinking of it now though because we're having a Christmas day at uni and need to work out when to start the Uni advent calender. And we need to buy presents which involves a lot of thinking.

Anyway...must dash, my brain is slowly listing up jobs I need to do. Write soon.

Cooking at Uni!

Below is a mini clip of me and Grant in the kitchen in our flat...serving up an amazing "Monday roast" which we cooked between us. You may find it amazing to know that I actually consumed most of the food on my plate. Very impressive.

I am beginning to find it a bit tiring to cook now. At first it was fun but now it is really hard trying not to cook the same food all the time and making sure you get the right balance of foods. Unfortunately my cooking skills are quite limited so it's hurting my head trying to read through the student cook book I was given by Cathy (thank you Cathy...I've really needed it!). You come to realise how thankful you are for your parents who, for your whole life, have remembered to have meals available every night! I was actually quite a fussy eater before I came to Uni but you kind of get over it as you realise that food is food and it goes in the mouth and you live a bit longer that day. If free food is around then there is no need to be so polite and if people don't finish their meals then food going in the bin is not an option...I haven't personally gone to that extreme of eating off others yet but who knows. So if anyone has any recipes that are less than an hour to make and have quite basic ingredients please send them my way, it would be much appreciated as I do have time to be playing around with different meals at the moment. I was really contemplating on making a casserole but they don't absolutely ages! Anyone know a quicker way that's less than 2 hours??
Pudding recipes are also welcome, our first week me and two of my flat mates were up at 3am making cookies! It was a lovely bonding session and yes we were hungry as most students are in that time of the morning...by the way 2am is actually an early night in student terms. Sorry parents but thankfully at the moment I only have one lecture that is in the morning and amazingly it's RE so I don't mind getting up for it. I'm sure after the excitement of being freshers has calmed down and we start having major work loads, we will all settle into a more reasonable sleep hour...as for now, too much fun is needed :)

Well I must dash, there is washing in the machine and I need to get the clothes out the dryer before they shrink! God bless, Es :)

Settling in more...

I'm beginning to adjust to Uni life now. Our course has begun to start properly now but we still haven't been given our proper timetable so still unsure of what's happening. But tomorrow I've got English and science...2 hours each, which will be interesting. I had today off which was nice, I got woken up by the warden opening my room and I was still in bed so I like screamed"no wait I'm in bed" so he gave me 10mins so that the electricians could come in and fix our lights...ye story...
Ok well Sunday night there was a little flood in the flat above us so mine and my mates rooms had water dripping into...ok more like rushing water. It was going into the lights and through my fire alarm which set all the fire alarms off and down the wall and door frames. So now my mates room smells damp and we couldn't use electrics for like 2 days.

What else has happened? Erm, had lectures and seminars. Been shopping for food...ye I'm starting to get some more confidence in the kitchen which is good. Hardly had any microwave meals. Had a really nice meal today...chicken, sweet and sour sauce, noodles and a bag of loads of different veges like peas (? me peas?), sweetcorn, beans, carrots etc. So that was nice. I also got my Uni hoodie today which is kinda big even though its a small...I'm sure it'll be nice in the winter. I also enrolled at the doctors and in the evening I went to the Christian Union which was good and met some more people, which I like lol.

So ye, rest of this week...tomorrow I'm going over to a girls house from my church with loads of other girls and we're going to watch a dvd and have a girly night. Thursday I'm not able to go to choir because I've got freshers flu(ish) so I'm going to this event at a Pub that the church have hired out and my mate is DJing and it's just a social thing that everyone and anyone can go to. Friday...erm dunno yet, sat dunno and Sunday I'm going to church which is called trinity. So ye, thats the excitement of my week...obviously I've got work and stuff to do so I'm sure it'll get done. So ye, going to go to bed now because I'm tired of straining my voice to talk and I got woken so early this morning...ye 12 is early lol.

Night people :)

First week of Uni

I've survived a week of Uni...just another 3 years minus a week left? Lol.
Some people are wondering how I'm coping and what I've been doing so I'll write a little brief thing on here.

Monday (17th): was the first official day. It started going into a Marquee, filling out health and safety forms and collecting free stuff. We then had a welcome meeting in the lecture room...no idea what they were saying. After lunch we went to another part of the campus down the road to tell them our subject strengths (mines religious Ed) and we did some singing and dancing...kinda like barn dancing. Was really funny...it was a way to meet new people and say who you were etc. Evening I spent socialising with new flat mates.

Tuesday: We had our first lecture...just an introduction to the active learning centre and then had a follow up task about childrens learning experiences with our environment blaa. We then signed up to loads of teaching unions and collected a box full of folders and books and papers which I still need to sort out. Also we met our personal tutors who set us an essay to do. In the evening I watched Forest Gump at a lil film event.

Wednesday: I had a 2hour maths test on the computer...eugh. My head hurt after. It was only to see what standard you were at and if you needed extra lessons...I think I must have done alright because I wasn't told to go to the extra lessons that have been happening this week. We then had to start doing our presentations which we had to be presented on friday. But luckily this was a group presentation but we had a hard debate topic: we don't need teachers anymore because we have the internet.

Thursday: My tutor group and a few others went to the wilderness centre in the forestof dean. It was some team building field trip which involved making dens out of the raw materials in the forest...was so much fun. And then we had to make like a huge one to fit like 4 people in and it had to be water proof because they later tipped water at it with us inside...yes i got very wet!

Friday: We did the presentation and to our relief not to the whole year. We then had a suprise which was half an hour of salsa which was sooo fun and then half an hour of belly dancing. I decided to leave when I heard belly dancing...I was too hungry and had pains in my tummy from laughing continuously 24-7 since I've been here. So I headed back to campus where there was a marquee with a feast inside of chinese food and indian and italien and british food haha. Was soooo yummy and was free. Loved it! Then in the evening they had a Cheesy Music night at another campus so me and my flat mates went there and such a fun night and we met some more people...as you do!

Saturday: Yep...involved sleep. Well going to sleep at 3am each night then waking at 7 was kinda getting to all of us. So got up at like 12 and then ended up going shopping and got my TV working. There was then another night of dancing at another campus. Always fun.

Sunday: More sleep. Lol. But when I finally got up I got ready and helped my mate out with things stuff. Cooked him some lunch/dinner...then we went to Church at 5. It's called Trinity and I really enjoyed it there. It was my first time and there was a group of 6 of us that walked up together. After we hung out in this bar they hired out to chat to some of the students at the church and to the student leaders. Was all good. We all enjoyed it and are planning to make it our Uni Church.

Monday: Today! Yes I am up at 4am (tuesday morning) typing this...was going to go to bed but thought I'd get this done. Today was the beginning of our course. We have professional studies all week. An hour lecture and then an hour seminar which is good to cope with and at a reasonable time...3!! Hehehe.

Anyway,I'm so going to bed now before I start making myself ill lol. Don't worry I'm looking after myself fine. You just don't want to go to sleep here because you want to be up making friends. It will all calm down I'm sure. Right...bed!!

Night night! Hope everyone is well. Missing you all deeply.
Esther :)

At University!

So I'm here. I made it! Feeling kinda hungry which I think I'm going to keep moaning about for a while. My room is really nice. All new interior and ensuite which is just lush :)
Internet works haha which was going to be an issue if it didn't...just had to fiddle with the automatic IP address but now its all good. I've also gone quite pink...bedding pink, cushions pink, toothbrush pink, internet wire pink - oops lol.

It's been really busy though...having meetings,talks, doing presentations, doing numeracy tasks and I've got my first lecture tomorrow. Bla it's all go. I just found a minute to do this as I'm waiting for the stove to become free for my chow mein stir fry lol. Btw I've got lovely flat mates and am slowly getting to know other people.

Either way, I'm happy, well (refusing to get fleshers flu so I've got a million and one vitamen C stuff) and hungry lol. Missing people aswell and I'm sorry if I'm forgetting to reply to things...it's really hard because you can't reply at the time because you don't want to be unsociable etc. You'll understand when you get there lol.

Anyway love you all.
God bless, Esther :)

3 Days to go...

Only 3 days till I leave for Uni!
It's beginning to get stressful...as most things usually get when there is a lack of motivation but know there is a lot to be done. Maybe my ID is acting out its refusal to leave or maybe, just maybe...I'm that lazy lol. I know a part of me is going to miss all the amazing friends I have and my family but at the same time I know that I am ready to go. I've had such a peace about where I'm going for such a long time and I know it's because I placed the decision in God's hands and I know that through the whole time there I'm going to have God with me every step of the way. He will keep be safe, loved and close :)

New Laptop!

On Sunday my parents brought me a beautiful laptop as part of the list of things I needed when at Uni. Its a Toshiba and I've named is Toshy...I think? I don't know yet, still early days. But its obviously a girl because it can multi-task.

Not long till I actually leave for Uni now...just less than 3weeks. It's a scary thought because there is so much that I need to do like essays and stuff that my course have asked me to complete before starting. It's stuff like fill in a maths and english audit...e.g. can I spell everyday words? Like? Car? Lol.
Either way, my living room is slowly collecting kitchen bits and bobs including some sexy oven gloves! Just got to find a TV now, the thought of no TV at Uni does scare me a bit, actually it's the no freeview thing that scares me lol.

Updates of the move will come soon!

It was worth it...

I passed my A-levels :) and I got into the Uni that I wanted to go to. So for the next month there will be packing, reading (from reading list), shopping (laptops, Tvs etc) and saying goodbye. Wow I'm soooo ecstatic that I got in...omw the freshers ball, what am I going to wear??
Ok people help, 007 theme - I can't exactly go in a tux!

Either way, I just want to thank God because without Him none of this would have happened. He is the reason for every smile :)

14 years of education...

...for this very day. A-level results!
At 12:01am I should be able to see if I've been accepted into my Uni. Knowing me it will prob be jammed by so many 18year olds desperately praying for the word "accepted". Albeit, at 9am on thursday 16th august, I will have in my hand the grades from my subjects that I've been working so hard for for the passed 2 years. In a few hours life will change...and I know I'm in His Hands :D

"What you honking at??"

The passed week, as my parents have been away, I've been walking to and from work. It's quite a trek yet can be quite enjoyable under some circumstances. However, what I object the most to is how in today's society women get degraded to...honks! If you're walking alone or with your girlfriends all you get is some annoying pervy driver honking at you and shouting out the window - "Come on darrrlllinnngg" and with some comical accent. Even if you ignore their pitiful behaviour they seem to continue on believing that we will turn around and go, "oh yes, your sleazy behaviour is everything I look for in a man" - COME ON! What happened to respect and dignity and gentlemen like behaviour?? Why are women subjected to such offensive and degrading conduct?

The other day a biker drove passed me blowing kisses quite dramatically - its humiliating!!!

I think I mite wear this round me next time!

A short get away!

This week I've been in Devon with the parentals. I got a train down there and back which was an experience in itself. I learnt that I'm turning out like my Dad lol and to me thats a scary thought. The reason I think this is because I've noticed how I can easily start talking to people - complete randomers. I really shouldn't talk to strangers but how do u meet new people?

I like to think I'm not the only one out of my siblings that talk for england, I'm glad to say that my Bro matt is the master at it haha.

A sunset taken on the train home...

So the hol was good, didn't do a lot, just sat on the beach and walked and stuff. Got burnt and then tanned which was my aim for the holiday - not the burnt bit really. Omw I really hurt my knees (I actually burnt half of them so one side was RED and the other snowy white) glad to say now that they've kinda evened out.
Now I'm home, with no milk...and its really hot and I got to trek to work in a bit :(
Exam results in 13days!!!

Prom- Year 13!

Prom 070707

What a fantastic night! We got a limo there as you can see and we had professional photos, a buffet and danced all night long... :)

Everyone looked stunning and it was a great way to say goodbye...Bye :)

Mobile Phone vs Bible

I wonder what would happen if we treated our Bible like we treat our cell phone?

What if we carried it around in our purses or pockets?

What if we flipped through it several time a day?

What if we turned back to go get it if we forgot it?

What if we used it to receive messages from the text?

What if we treated it like we couldn't live without it?

What if we gave it to Kids as gifts?

What if we used it when we traveled?

What if we used it in case of emergency?

This is something to make you go...hmm...where is my Bible?

Oh, and one more thing. Unlike our cell phone, we don't have to worry about our Bible being disconnected because Jesus already paid the bill.

Silver Ring Thing

Silver Ring Thing is a US-based sexual abstinence program which encourages young adults to remain celibate until marriage. Inscribed on the ring is a Bible verse. The verse is 1Thessalonians 4:3-4 and it states "God wants you to be holy, so you should keep clear of all sexual sin. Then each of you will control your body and live in holiness and honor." The rings are tokens of their vow, a reminder of their decision to remain celibate.

In recent news there has been a UK teenage girl who has been told not to wear her ring at school because it goes against the school dress code. Lydia Playfoot took her case to wear the ring to the High Court claiming that her school was discriminating against her by not allowing the wearing of a purity ring.

I was quite interested when I saw this on the News because I had heard of the Silver Ring Thing before this and never knew of many other Christians in the UK that were aware or even had the Ring. I personally don't have the Ring because of the decision that I don't need a material use to maintain my beliefs however I'm not saying that people shouldn't wear it - I'm actually really encouraged that they do and I think it is amazing, at the end of the day it's a personal choice. It crossed my mind though that if this issue has reason then how about the idea of people wearing necklaces with crosses on??

A song describing what's on my heart...

It's all about You, Jesus
And all this is for You
For Your glory and your fame
It's not about me
As if You should do things my way
You alone are God And I surrender to your ways

Jesus, lover of my soul
All consuming fire is in Your gaze
Jesus, I want you to know
I will follow you all my days
For no one else in history is like you
And history itself belongs to you
Alpha and Omega, You have loved me
And I will share eternity with You

14 years of School...

...and now it's over!!!
I've finally left school, I had my last day on Thursday. It is sad thinking that I may not see these amazing people again but part of me is also excited about all the adventures my future will hold, the people I will meet and the whole Uni life.
But till I can start thinking of that I need to pass these silly A-levels, which involves a bit of motivation which I'm actually lacking at the moment.
And I've got a cold now - the day I leave is the day I get ill. I'm sure it's because I haven't had much sleep due to getting up early every morning the last week just to wash my hair because we've had a lot of photos taken.

1993-2007!

And so much has happened in my life. I've met some amazing people who I will know forever and will love forever! I started wondering on Thursday- where will all these people be in 5 or 10 years time?! When I'm 28 (ahh) where will I be? I guess so many things can come into your path so there is no point planning things but to just allow the path to flow and to follow it, making sure you're living life to the full on each bend. Of course it's OK to dream but also to remember that sometimes life can become better than what you dream - you just have to allow it!
So what are my "dreams"...to love and marry and have children and to change lives and find contentment while at my lowest state. To have more friendships and to learn from each person I know and allow them to touch my life through their unique awesomeness. And to gain wisdom and understanding from wise people and then have opportunities where I can pass it on to others.
I want to have better than a dream...I want a life!

What happened...

...to a fairy tale love story? With mystery and men who come and sweep you off your feet. When men act like real gentlemen and will turn their world upside down to win the heart of the girl they love.
It doesn't matter what clique you're from, we all aspire for the same magical love story.

So why have our child like fantasies faded with age? Maybe it doesn't even exist, that Disney just needed some more money so made it up? Or maybe we have such a delusion view because of the countless ends of marriages our society now sees?

But the idea had to come from somewhere and every human needs love in their lives - maybe a love story better than a fairy tale can come true? A love story better than all the dreams we have for our lives. God might have dreams for my life better than what I can even imagine, but I won't be able to see it if I don't give him my life, my all. But that involves trying not to take control myself. It takes a lot of faith but faith is the belief in something beyond comprehension and I know I believe that God loves me and I trust Him completely with my life and I know His plans for me are better than my own. So how exciting would it be to give Him control over my love life? To allow Him to guide me where He wants - He's the author of my life so why not allow Him to write a best selling love story?

Footprints in the Sand

These are my footprints - I took the pic and placed the text over. Its a famous piece of text and is seen on many things like keyrings, bookmarks, cards etc. I believe that God does carry us - I know He carries me. God bless x

Quote

Sometimes the greatest journey is the distance between two people...

Learning to trust!

Life's no longer carefree. As kids, life was so carefree but I'm beginning to notice life isn't so. I'm starting to face the issues of adulthood, or just experiencing life, I don't know but it's not so fun because not a lot mattered when I was young. Heartbreak, illnesses, people leaving, starting a new life, losing friends and love ones. I'm just so grateful that I have the love of Christ in my life, someone who I can fall back on and to cast all my burdens upon because I know he cares for me.

"Always be strong, trust in the Lord your God"

Lyrics from a song I wrote when I was 12/13 yrs old. These simple yet true words have got me through some hard times. I just have to remember to trust! Thankyou God! x

Ironic

I just wrote "forgive" in my media player and the only song that came up was "runaway" by the Corrs. It seems to contradict each other because to forgive someone you shouldn't run away - you have to face the issue face to face. You can't runaway from the issue and expect it to get better or to go away because it won't - instead it will begin to root and it will make you bitter. So forgive when it's easier, from the start! It would be horrible if they died tomoro and you didn't forgive them...

Happy 4th Birthday Blog!

Wow 4 years this blog had been running! No idea how much of an impact it has made to anything but sometimes we never know how much we can be touching a life...
For the next year you will see such a change in my life...as I leave home and head off into the world, I pray you'll be here to share it with me!
Love and God bless,
Girl With A Mission! x

Things can only get better!

Snaps for God!

I got my January exam results back last week. I'm pretty happy but I know it was all God because when I was stressing and crying my eyes out for hours - he was the one who got me through it all. I prayer for his guidance in those exams and for his peace and when he tested me I listened : he wanted me to go to church to hang out with him for only like 3 hours but I was like WHAT I need to revise dude, do you want me to fail and He was like chill out girlie I know what's on that paper and I was like well I don't and then He said trust me -- somehow when God tells us to trust him it puts an overwhelming peace on the situation so I did end up going to church and a result of that was an A! I did work hard, you can't just pray for God to give you an A or even a pass without putting the effort in. But truthfully God has been in every single exam with me all the way through my GCSEs and now Alevels...just got June exams to go - come on God!!!!

Learning how to smile...

Most find days like Valentines day hard to get through when they are "alone". Admittedly I do, but I don't understand why, there must be some pressure from society to mope around and be sad when you are "single" and when no one has sent you anything on valentines day.
But I don't want to be like that anymore - I want to be happy for my friends who are in love and just keep smiling each day with hope in my heart that God has set aside someone amazing for me.

Anyway, I'm not even alone or single - I have God in my life who I have a spiritual relationship with - and if I can't be happy during my season of singleness, then when my future husband comes into my life it won't change anything. I have to learn to feel complete within my relationship with God because my future husband won't be able to "complete" me spiritually or emotionally.

Fall in love with the Creator first and then when God writes your husband/wife into your love story it will be better than any fairy tale.

Snow Day!!!

How immense is SNOW!!! It's such a rare thing to have in the UK but when it does/if it comes , it's the best thing! I made a HUUGGGEE SnowMan in the back garden - I felt like a kid (hence the baby voice in the video).

The Farm!

Today I went to the Farm with the Reception children at the Primary School I'm getting work experience at.

We saw some ducks, sheep, cows, a pig and chickens! It was a surprisingly cold day and I thought my toes were going to drop off lol...I'm still in some patronising, child talking mode lol.

But yeh it was a fun day- we watched the children feed the animals and they collected some eggs. Then after lunch they split into groups and did different group activities like learn about what things were on the Farm that they could use to make a collage and about different textures and they did rubbings (you know when you get some paper and a crayon and rub to see the texture).

I'm all sleepy now though lol!

Top Friends on MySpace!

The "Top Friends" things just causes upset and arguments I feel and I don't like them cuz its like u have to work extra hard to be a better friend and like you're always competing against someone. And if no one actually has you as a top friend then you just feel like what's the point you know...sometimes in life there is always one person who seems to win out better and they are always there beating you at it and its just like eugh, why bother?!

So to make a statement I don't have top friends and I don't rank my friends in order because they are all sooo special to me in all very different ways - everyone has different friendships and relationships than others and there is no possible way in comparing them.

How do you know?!

I'm at the critical point in my life where I have to decide where to spend the next 3 years - possibly more - of my life living. There are too many things to consider and I have balance things against each other.
Anyone want to decide for me?
Or any advice on deciding...I think I have an idea but I need to make sure I'm 100% sure.

Help?!

My 18th Birthday Balloon!

In loving memory of my balloon who lived for nearly 2months!! Brought on 9/12/06 and only has a few days left. Goodbye! x

How do you know?

How do you know when you've matured? Or becoming someone who you like more?

Having a hard reality smack you in the face and then working out how to deal with it isn't easy, but at different ages we would handle the situation differently. Like making a mistake, for example, when we are young we might lie about it but as we mature we may admit to it and deal with the consequences. I'm not saying this is true for each individual but you know what I'm getting at.

But knowing how you are reacting to a situation and then compare how you could have reacted is pretty amazing...especially if you're acting in the right way.
Without going into specifics I'm dealing with a reality but even though it's scary I'm glad to see that I'm mature to deal with it and I know that dealing with it is going to help me mature more.
Just a thought.

Let me finish woman!

Omw just had an RS exam which I really really wanted an A on and this stupid woman who was in the exam with us was sooo slow at getting the exam started and she kept faffing and she didn't know how long the exams were - she was pointless! Then at the end 10.07!!!! we had to finish and she was like right stop now and I said ok just finishing writing the word - i got to sa for said, she wouldn't even let me finish the sentence which most people allow you to do! Grr and then my row sat for ages (btw a row of 3!) because she forgot about us and we were waving our papers in the air and was like oh! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Sorry needed a rant!

One thing I've learnt today...

I'm meant to be doing revision but the only thing I've learnt is that I'm a pro at wasting time - well it's probably more knowing how to avoid doing what I don't want to do.

I think it's time for lunch...after wasting an hour organising my emails

Ooops!

Celebrate

We celebrate

You put dancing in our hearts

We celebrate

For all you've done and who you are

We lift your name

High above all other names

You are Lord of Heaven and Earth

Yehhhhhhh!